If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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