How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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