while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
