is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
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