Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
