I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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