Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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