The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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