omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
