Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
