what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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