i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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