Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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