Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
