Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
