she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He's on the porch naked. Help.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize