wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize