That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
