Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Pants are for mortals
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize