New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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