Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
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