Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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