Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
