we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
