I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize