I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
