I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
