You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.