threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza