I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
How external is "for external use only"?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
