dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
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