This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize