Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize