I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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