apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize