marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize