Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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