Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
