I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
No subtext here. People are naked.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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