After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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