you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
