I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
