Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize