Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
My dad is sitting where you rode me
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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