I think I just saw someone hide a body.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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