found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
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It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
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On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize