I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I intend to get homeless drunk
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
