that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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