hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
vagina is talking i cant
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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