It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
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You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
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DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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