Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.

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(303): View more from Colorado

We took shots in honor of Shark Week.

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(518): View more from New York

i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.

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(301): View more from Maryland

I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(913): View more from Kansas

I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!

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(850): View more from Florida

if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him

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(+61): View more from Australia

There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.

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(410): View more from Maryland

I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.

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