Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting

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  (305): best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting http://tfl.nu/0qs3
  Replies (9) Good night (2157) Bad night (579)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........

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  (918): If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........ http://tfl.nu/fan3
  Replies (13) Good night (657) Bad night (3272)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.

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  (780): The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day. http://tfl.nu/xftd
  Replies (20) Good night (5327) Bad night (1282)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?

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  (215): What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many? http://tfl.nu/72mb
  Replies (27) Good night (2747) Bad night (1556)
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  (707): View more from California

  Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.

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  (707): Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car. http://tfl.nu/kt4h
  Replies (13) Good night (4532) Bad night (2524)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working

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  (303): im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working http://tfl.nu/2ufm
  Replies (5) Good night (1473) Bad night (3741)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".

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  (404): He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer". http://tfl.nu/vh03
  Replies (7) Good night (4440) Bad night (900)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.

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  (803): I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night. http://tfl.nu/gwrd
  Replies (5) Good night (654) Bad night (1777)
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  (805): View more from California

  It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.

  (1-805): View more from California

  That's kinky shit dude.

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  (805): It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening. (1-805): That's kinky shit dude. http://tfl.nu/fc85
  Replies (9) Good night (920) Bad night (1170)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?

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  (740): I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that? http://tfl.nu/cfbo
  Replies (4) Good night (286) Bad night (605)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.

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  (781): i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops. http://tfl.nu/wb46
  Replies (1) Good night (548) Bad night (235)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  okay we need to get tested.

  (1-732): View more from New Jersey

  no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.

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  (732): okay we need to get tested. (1-732): no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride. http://tfl.nu/uj9n
  Replies (2) Good night (312) Bad night (491)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  She won. Twice.

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  (519): Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition. (1-519): She won. Twice. http://tfl.nu/gb3x
  Replies (3) Good night (860) Bad night (407)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.

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  (616): You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina. http://tfl.nu/i89m
  Replies (1) Good night (353) Bad night (237)
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  (805): View more from California

  you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends

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  (805): you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends http://tfl.nu/d359
  Replies (5) Good night (276) Bad night (632)

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