He's been sleeping iwht ***
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
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he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
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And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.